break

what are you doing?
I can't sleep. I am thinking about you.
gay! - uh, no, actually i have the same problem.
can i ask you something?
yeah, go ahead.
well, to keep the tradition of quoting songs alive: were all the things you told me 'lies out of fear to lose a could-be dream-lover of a lifetime'?
no. leave me alone Emeralda, I don't wanna talk about this.
did you realize, that you did everything to me, that you were ever afraid of I would do to you?
Like what?
Like kissing someone else or leaving me. Matter of fact you left exactly at the time that you were afraid I would leave.
I never left anywhere.
You did.
No I did not leave Emeralda
But you said it is over my love. You said thank you for the great time and the great memories and that it is over.
Did I say that?
Why couldn't you take a break, why did you have to end it?
I thought that was what we were doing. Taking a break.
--*baffled*
I really don't wanna talk about it.
It's just that I needed to tell you that I felt very undramatically that it feels just wrong for some reason. I need to know what you think about it. Because if it is what I thought it was I have to admit that it feels very very terrible. You have no idea. I promised you not to cry on the phone and all that, but it does feel very terrible.
I know
I don't want you to feel obliged in any way. it's just that I need to have the clarity and I am sorry if I ruin yet another of your nights. I just can't take it it's too much right now not to know.
I don't know Emeralda
I can take way more than that. You know that It's about the last bit of hope which to kill is very cruel. If we take a break we can see organically what will happen without killing that little bit of hope.
I love you Emeralda. *whipsers* I always will
I love you too Mr. D

And a smile emerges in my little heart.