Wish You Were Here

I'm not ever gonna change. I know that for a fact. Please. Emeralda, don't cry, can't you cry after you hang up...
I don't know what this feeling is like. I can't describe it. Something is trying to come out of me. Salt water, snodder, sobbing waves, a pain from this place nobody knows until they get stabbed right there.
Now I understand at least, what this song is about. Oh man, I Wish You Were Here.
Do you really think you can tell.... heaven from hell... blue sky from pain...
Do you really think you know that you are not gonna change. ever.
But i wanted to be with you I say and it all falls down and on my chest, I can't breathe. I just wanted to be with you.
When I say I know it is gonna be that way you say and I sob and weep and weep and ask you why can'y you just say we are going to be together and then it is going to be that way because you said so.
I knew from day one that it is not going to work out.
But I wanted to be with you, I was going to stay here for you.
oh Emeralda don't put that on me now please. please.
but maybe it's going to work later, you just have to take everything a step at a time and use all your energy now to get better. Don't put up with me. just get better. and then we will see.
Emeralda, It will only work when you give up all your friends. I know that one day I would even have hated Tiffany. Thats how I am. I am a fucking lunatic. I am never going to be with anybody.
Is that why you left Anna I ask and I really don't know why I fucking ask that. I shouldn't. It's not the point.
Yes.
I really didn't want to know that.
But you didn't love her like you love me
N-no. Emeralda, we were at the point where we could have gotten married. That's how I am. I always end it there.
He is only 20. How can he tell. How can he fucking tell.

Today I felt so much how I am better of alone
But I really wished so badly you would have come home
I miss you so much
I just want to be with you. Oh my god.
Oh how I wish, how I wish you were here.
I don't know anymore what to say.

I am never ever going to be with anybody Emeralda.
I smile under tears. You know it's funny. I thought the same thing. One day I was sitting here and I cried because I realized that if I want to follow this feeling that haunts me since childhood, that I have to do something, I don't know yet what it is...but I realized that I can't do it if you can't take my love for the world too.
I can't.
I know. Anyways, I mean, we don't know. But I was thinking right then that..
I have to go
I am just about to tell you something
I have to go
why
BECAUSE
okay.

I have a fucking hole in my stomach
and then you hung up
and I am in a sobby mess
and I wanted to tell you that me too, I had this feeling, that if I have to sacrifice our relationship, our love for this thing I feel I have to do in life, then I will never every gonna be with anybody again in my life.
As a way of paying for that sacrileg to abandon love

we are so young. so incredibly young man